Enough Already

Is it just me, or will this winter just....not....END. When I was a kid, I always loved winter, because winter meant Christmas, and Snow Days, and Hot Chocolate, and afternoons spent sitting in front of the television trying collect all 7 pieces (or was it 8?) of the Triforce.

But I'm not a kid anymore. Sometimes, growing up really sucks. My boss won't take "Sorry, it's snowy, I'm gonna stay home and play video games" as an excuse. If I was Hot Chocolate, I either have to make it myself, or march my fat ass down to the gas station and buy it myself. Christmas was over almost 2 months ago. Now that I'm an adult, winter is a dirty car, shoveling out my driveway, trudging through 2 inches of black soupy slushy crap just to get from my car to the door of my office.

I'm going go on record right now and say, I'm miss spring and summer. I miss everything about it. I miss the loose freedom of driving around in shorts and a t-shirt. I miss the drive-in theater, I miss being out on the lake, I miss pulling into a gas station and hoping like hell I get the pump next to the 19 year old blond hottie wearing Daisy Dukes and a bikini top (oops, perhaps I went too far?)

Please be 18

But right now, that's all just a pipe dream. The car is completely encrusted in slush and salt and just gray dingy CRAP. Usually, Indiana Winters are fairly consistent. It's either warm(ish) and cloudy, or cold but sunny. This winter though, has been especially brutal. It's been the perfect combination of freezing cold (several mornings in the past month it's been in single digit temperatures) and suicide-gray overcast. Now, the weather professionals will tell us that when it's overcast at night, the temperature won't drop as much, but I'm thinking they are all full of crap. After all, these are the same geniuses who told us today it was going to be overcast this morning, and sunny in the afternoon, but no snow. So I wake up this morning, and there's 2 - 3 fresh inches of "no snow" covering my driveway, and it's still coming down pretty steady. This can't be right. The weather-chump told me it wasn't going to happen.

So I head to the weather website to look at the maps. I'll be damned, there is a narrow band of snow the exact width of my county right over top of us. OK, just bad luck, but it should end within the next 15 - 20 minutes. 2 hours later I head to work, and it's snowing just as hard as it was before. This can't be right.

So I get to work, E-mail my girlfriend to say "Good morning beautiful" and check the weather map again. I'll be damned. That narrow band of snow isn't moving west-to-east like normal. No, this thing is coming straight down out of the north like Satan's Middle Finger and moving straight south.

So finally, about 11 this morning the snow ended and sun came out. The roads and parking lots melted, and I saw the sun for the first time in what's felt like two months. Wonderful! Tomorrow is supposed to be 45 and sunny. Even better! Maybe I'll take my car through the car wash to have the crap cleaned off of it.

Wait...what's this? Another snow system set to move through the area on Friday? Oh, but the weather forecast says we won't get much. Batten down the hatches kids, knowing our luck, we're gonna get hit by a hurricane.

Al Gore can shove Global Warming up his fat ass!